December used to be sacred.

Now it’s a 30-day hostage situation sponsored by Visa, MasterCard, and some elf with unresolved trauma.

Somehow, we took the birth of Jesus—a barefoot revolutionary born in a borrowed barn—and turned it into:

“BUY NOW OR YOUR KID WILL THINK YOU’RE POOR” Twelve payments of regret And a partridge in a debt notice

Jesus came into the world with no crib, no assistant manager, no marketing plan, and somehow we honored Him by buying a 7-foot inflatable Santa fist-fighting a snowman in the neighbor’s yard.

Respect.

Modern Christmas According to Society

Jesus: born to save humanity Society: “Cool cool… but have you seen this air fryer?”

December has become Give Me Season.

Kids want stuff.

Adults want stuff.

Relatives want specific stuff with receipts.

And somewhere in the background, Mary’s like,

“Hey… my kid literally changed history?”

And everyone’s like,

“Yeah, yeah—circle back after New Year’s.”

**The Wise Men Brought Gold.

We Bring Credit Card Statements.**

The Wise Men didn’t roll up with:

Bluetooth toys Matching pajamas A receipt stapled to a passive-aggressive gift card

They brought meaning.

Gold, frankincense, and myrrh—

which, let’s be honest, still makes more sense than buying someone a $300 gadget they’ll forget by February.

Jesus Is the Only One Not Asking for Anything

That’s the wild part.

The one person December is supposed to be about is:

Not asking for money Not asking for gifts Not asking for attention

Just:

“Love each other.

Take care of the broken.

Be kind.”

And humanity responded with:

“Cool story, bro. Now watch me fight a stranger in Target over a discounted toaster.”

A Dirty Face Truth

If Jesus showed up today, He wouldn’t be mad.

He’d just sigh…

flip over the returns counter…

and say:

“You missed the point—but I still love you.”

Because He always does.

Maybe This Year…

Maybe this year Christmas doesn’t need to be:

Bigger Louder Or wrapped in debt and glitter trauma

Maybe it can be:

Quieter Kinder A little more… holy mess instead of holy stress

Light a candle.

Say a prayer.

Hug your people.

Forgive someone who doesn’t deserve it.

And remember a baby was born who didn’t need a damn thing—

but gave everything anyway.

Peace & Love, you beautiful holiday heathens.

— Saint Dirty Face™

Stay Dirty. Stay Dangerous.