Saint Dirty Face

by Saint Dirty Face™

They keep telling me to breathe.

To “find my peace.”

To “let go of the anger.”

Cute advice. Real cute.

I’ve been holding my breath for decades — not because I forgot how to breathe, but because I didn’t trust what might come out if I did.

They don’t understand.

Some of us didn’t grow up with candles and calm music.

We grew up with slammed doors, swallowed words, and prayers that smelled like whiskey.

So when I say “One day I’m going to say f**k it,” I’m not talking about losing my mind.

I’m talking about reclaiming it.

🩸 The Demons Aren’t the Problem

They’re not monsters.

They’re bodyguards.

Every snarl, every scar, every dark laugh in my head —

those were my protectors when “calm” wasn’t an option.

You don’t destroy your demons.

You give them a job.

You teach them how to fight for you instead of against you.

One day, I’ll stop apologizing for the fire.

I’ll stop pretending I’m “fine.”

And when that day comes,

I’ll open the cage — and let the demons play.

Not to burn the world down.

But to light it the hell up.

🔥 Reflection

The truth is, peace without authenticity is just sedation.

And I’m done being sedated.

If my faith is messy, if my mind is loud,

then so be it.

Maybe that’s how God built me —

loud, loyal, and a little bit dangerous.

Because maybe… holiness isn’t about silence.

Maybe it’s about survival.

So yeah — one day, I’m going to say “f**k it.”

And I’ll mean it.

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Saint Dirty Face™

[Stay Dirty, Stay Rebellious™]

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